Strange Little Girls

"Rock music is a vehicle of anti-religion." - Pope Benedict XVI

Speaking of vehicles of anti-religion, I went to see the Shins last night with JD. Some of you knew who the Shins were for a while now. My friend Aimee (who is smarter than you) made me listen to them once in my car on my birthday a years ago. I think she might have introduced them to me before they were even a real rock group. That’s how ahead of the curve we were, full-on zygote Shins love. Besides tickling ears with audio candy and making Garden State an adequate diversion, the Shins are clearly impotant to me because their keyboard player dates or used to date my favorite contestant of America’s Next Top Model, Season 1, Elyse Sewell. She is one hot bitch, and therefore the Shins rule. The Electric Factory was packed to the hilt with exactly four types of people:

1. Faux-sensitive frat guys who thought Garden State rocked.
2. Authentic fans who don’t get out much but REALLY relate to the Shins.
3. Sexually ambiguous cool kids concerned enough to nod along, butdetached enough to remain cool.
4. A girlfriends or wanna-be girlfriends to any of the aforementioned.

Sadly, going to the concert meant I couldn’t go to quizzo this week at Fado. Three of the smart kids went though and managed to pull out a second place under the team name “Lost without Our Leader.”

Erin Elmore news!!! Just when we thought she was moving somewhere in the near Fitler Square in Philadelphia, my informant emailed me this bit of info this morning. (By the way, my informant just got it from philly.com, so it’s not all that secret. Informant makes it sound cool and clandestine.):

Posted on Thu, Apr. 28, 2005 Dan Gross 'Fired,' Erin gets TV gig LOCAL "Apprentice" reject Erin Elmore starts Monday as a TV reporter in Jacksonville, Fla. The lawyer/model will spend a month working on a tryout basis at NBC affiliate WTLV's First Coast News. If she and the station are pleased, she may be offered a full-time role, says station president Ken Tonning. For some reason the already- hot Elmore is going to be made over for the new job for a piece in In Touch magazine. Elmore and her longtime boyfriend, Eric Henry, an attorney who is a Marine veteran of the war in Iraq, will do the long-distance thing for the month.

I ate at an Arby’s once in Jacksonville, and if that’s any indication of the fun Erin has in store for her, then I am totally jealous. Erin’s love affair with the Fitler Square neighborhood was short lived, but memorable indeed. Please send postcards! LYLAS!

I ate at Dmitri’s the other night on 3rd and Catherine, and I ordered the Calamari even though I don’t like seafood. Sometimes I even confuse myself. It was quite good. The hummus was delightful as well. I used to think that hummus was just for vegan and vegetarian pansies, however, it turns out it’s for all kinds of pansies. Yum! Also, I had some of JC’s birthday lamb, and it was worthy, like the Bible says. I highly recommend Dmitri’s, despite the fact that we never actually met anyone there named Dmitri.

A crazy woman on the street (artist's rendition) today told me I was an asshole for not donating 60 cents a day to help starving children somewhere. I had my headphones on and tapped me on the shoulder and asked me if I wanted to “help change the world and bring about some positive energy.” I said sure as long as it didn’t involve giving any money. Then she rolled her eyes and said, “Whatever asshole.” I told her that wasn’t an effective way of bringing about all this positive energy that was important enough to interrupt my listening to ABBA on my discman. Talk about a downer! She’s never going to feed any children with that attitude.

Anyway, enough downers. I took a test online today to see which fierce contestant of this season’s America’s Next Top Model I am. I am so excited to report that I am Kahlen. Since I predict that she is totally going to win this season, I think that’s an omen of good things to come for me. She, like Elyse, see above, is one hot bitch. However, I think I have better lips.